Becoming a Stereotype

I wrestle with it. It keeps me up at night. I struggle to put it into words. To assign it a voice and a depth of meaning. Like a Mama bear pacing in front of her cave in some moments. Like an obligation I do not know how to quite carry. A spiraling into the unknown.

I swing between complete responsibility, wrestling to discern maturity during full disclosure, and an “it’s beyond my grasp” deflation. This unknown people becoming known. Because some white people showed up.

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How does one portray them? How can I explain them? Things I wrestle with about their culture that I’m still processing, sometimes aloud. Things I admire. Overwhelming lessons. Overwhelming obligations and responsibilities.

All while walking on a thin line. How can I keep them from becoming a stereotype? They’re not just faces to push a platform. Faces to represent a statement they never made.

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What would their mother think? That baby who could be portrayed as helpless that she has nursed through the first two years of life as her utter prize. Her long awaited miracle. What would his father think seeing his son be portrayed as desperate? That son he is intentionally raising to be a man.

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Tread lightly, beloved, as you tell a story that is not your own. Step carefully and carry the responsibility well as many may unknowingly place an agenda on their shoulders, words in their mouths, or an ideal written on their faces that they would never say.

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He is N’s boy. F’s baby girl. F and Y’s precious sister who my girls run to hug from across the field. They are my precious D and L who pushed past my foreign ways with giggles and I always just so happen to find sitting right beside me each week. He’s A’s boy who always looks after his brother, and holds his hands out to the little ones to make sure they know there’s a seat for them. They and countless others. They are real, live, and utterly amazing people.

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People with voices.

People with stories.

People with hopes.

They are ours because they’ll have us, not because we claim them.

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I wrestle with it. And I think we all should. Because they’re not props. They are people. A bright future. And we have a responsibility to them, whether we know them personally or not. They’re not a status. They’re not a symbol. A poster child for a lesson they never intended to teach.

 

Tread lightly, beloved.

Step carefully and carry the responsibility well.

There’s always so much more to learn. Growth to be had.

(She reminds herself at 2 a.m.).

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How can it even be put into words?

 

Roadtrip!

I got the opportunity to return to the Johannesburg area for a women’s conference in the beginning of March.

I had planned to go to this conference months prior to our emergency trip to Johannesburg in December and I was thankful that God had restored my health enough that I could go at nine weeks second post-op.

It was my first time crossing the border without Matt and taking a roadtrip to South Africa with a bunch of wonderful ladies.

Thanks to my buddy and colleague, Liana, we navigated there well and enjoyed a bit of kid free time for a week. Honestly, I didn’t really know what to do with myself with all the free time, but I found some useful ways of enjoying the time.

I even got to visit a dear friend who also happened to be my surgeon during my previous adventure in Johannesburg. Funny how God orchestrates friendship even amongst the most challenging circumstances. While it brought up some triggers, it was such a blessing to get to share a smoothie with a friend who thankfully wasn’t wearing scrubs that day. 😉 She was sick or I would have asked to take a picture together. But I have a feeling there will probably be a next time for a picture. =)

We stayed on a beautiful piece of property with some friends that we partner with here in Mozambique, Palavra da Vida (Word of Life). I even had some added friends join my morning Bible time. The welcome mat was always out! =)

We enjoyed some solid Biblical teaching and refreshment at a conference in Pretoria.

And some fun out with the ladies before returning home.

When we got back to Mozambique, we enjoyed a little time with our team (though we missed our supervisors who are Stateside right now). Matt brought the girls up to the capital where we reunited after a week apart and then after restocking a bit we returned back to Maxixe a few days later.

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Of course we couldn’t miss out on a little bit of fun with our teammates there in the capital. =)

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Yay for restock and a pit-stop at the “grocery” on the way home.

It was indeed a wonderful trip and a wonderful homecoming.

Zambian Zeal

The day after that Portuguese “I Do” we ran off to a training in Zambia.

We spent two wonderful weeks learning, growing, praying and praising our Father for His Word and His work. Through studying some great passages and applying it to the Bible as a whole, we talked through, prayed through and strategized further evangelism focus among the Massinga, Maxixe, and Chopi bodies of believers in Mozambique.

(Uncle John and Aunt Wanne we’re there! 🙂 )

The girls all enjoyed a GREAT kids program in which they all got to be together (huge bonus for kids that normally do life together).

The lake conference center was gorgeous and had some really cool neighbors not so common in all parts of the world. 😉

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(Impalas alert, but they’re really camouflage)

We took a quick hop to Johannesburg, South Africa on the way home for routine doctors appointments and then after nearly three weeks of July had passed, we returned home to Mozambique.

(We ran into our Moz supervisors in Joburg. 🙂 )

Despite some normal air sickness (Sigh) and some flight delays,

we all had a safe and happy travel, returned feeling refreshed and are further focused in how to better support the furthering of the Gospel here in Mozambique.

Road Trip!!!

We had an opportunity to head to South Africa for a few days while getting a car rack installed on our vehicle. We took a few days to play and gather supplies after the car work was done before we returned to Mozambique. Here’s some of our adventure.

I love that despite having a bed for each girl, there in our little cottage, our ladies chose to share a big sister sleep-over each night. Their little hearts are beautiful. No one could be left out.

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We went ahead and got our hair trimmed while there in South Africa. I usually trim everyone’s hair while we’re here in Mozambique, but the girls enjoyed the spoiling.

Eden REALLY enjoyed the hair washing part.

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The girls enjoyed the opportunity to play in restaurant play areas while we waited on our food. Honestly it was insane some of these play areas for the kids and they absolutely had a blast.

We even went to an indoor splash pad.

And burned crazy amounts of energy at a trampoline park.

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We had some really yummy “American” food.

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And while it was an utter blast, I love that my girls could not wait to come home to their backyard, their bikes, their friends and their Mozambique. It was a beautiful time as a family to appreciate the blessing of more “Western World fun” while still appreciating the richness of life here amid the more simple. I love that my girls were really able to embrace that well; rejoicing in both places and having family conversations about the value of the two worlds we live in. And all of our hearts were full to the max as we turned down our street to return home here in Mozambique.

God has truly blessed us to the uttermost.

We are beyond grateful.

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Thanks for the fun, South Africa!

 

 

 

As We Enter Here

We always know when the city is pumping water. You can see it in that little bounce in our steps. We’re actually going to have good water pressure, right now. Quick, everyone take a shower!!!

 

So we live in a city of 100,000+ people, which manifests itself  in a handful of “city blocks” and a never-ending wind of pot-hole filled, sometimes deteriorating, dirt roads. You can almost see the accepted, yet urban pants-wearing young adult woman and foreigner contrasting the overwhelming majority of the skirt-wearing, rural farm-wife community. We are the beautiful tapestry of six blocks of urban gets dropped into the lap of the rural countryside.

For us that means entering the community well. Learning the patterns of city water pumping. Talking to a whole host of “can you help us fix this” people. Beginning friendships with a lot of “can you help us build this” now-familiar faces. We are breaking through conversations as, our previous supervisor says, people put us in “boxes” or “files” of where we belong. Are we a traveler? Are we actually going to stick around? Are we here to hand out stuff? Are we going to respect them and their culture? Are we going to be a flaunting Westerner? Are we going to be a lavish vacationer? Are we going to respond when they speak the local dialect? Where do we belong?

We’ve been told we speak Portuguese like people from our language city. I use it as an opportunity to pray for and thank the Lord for my language teacher and the program up north. The hours and hours of investment. I will never take them for granted.

But with the slight distance of such a “you are foreign” statement, comes a softness in their eyes as we know the normal greeting. Sincerity can be seen and felt. It’s a slow process, but a process that has begun, nonetheless.

We are the white family with four girls. No, we are not in need of a little boy. Yes, they are all just like a flight of stairs. Yes, they all understand Portuguese. Yes, the oldest can carry a conversation with you in Portuguese. Yes, the baby of our family looks like a doll. And yes, sometimes the littlest ones in our family will also say the respectfully appropriate greeting while you swoon and try to tickle their chins. We go through this same routine with every new and semi-new face.

But that’s ok. Because it’s called entering a community. And it happens slowly. Building daily. As we enter here one footprint at a time.

Through our preschooler, you can experience the entrance process: When the house has no furniture, you ask questions of when we will return to our “real home in” our language city. As our belongings come in from our language city (5 days later), you have a flood of delight and still confusion about when we will return to our “real home in” our language city.  The one everyone calls your twin whom you still take naps with, keeps talking about all the homes you have lived in. She lists off grandma’s house, something called FPO which she always refers to as having those familiar names of our friends who were there, then there’s Disney World which she keeps telling you was an awesome home we lived in, but you don’t believe her when she says this is our new home. In the first newness, you announce in your excitement that next time we have ice cream, we should bring Emilia (our house helper from our language city). When your sisters explain that Emilia lives 2 days away by car, you look puzzled and take a bite of your cone.

The first time we walk to the market is an automatic hip-riding experience. Don’t look at me, don’t touch me. I belong to Mommy. The second time, you walk to the entrance of the market holding Mommy’s hand, then the first time someone talks to you, it’s an INSTANT pick-up need. I belong to Mommy.

The next time to the market you make it past the entrance on your own feet, but descending the steps someone tries to tickle your chin and it’s game over. I belong to Mommy, here in Mommy’s arms. Mommy keeps saying they’re just trying to play with you. You don’t believe it. You remind Mommy that they are a stranger, not your real friends. Mommy explains that you said hello to your real friends for the first time back in your language city. You think for a minute. You talk about it a little with Mommy. And the next time prompted, you say hello and ask how the strange lady is doing today. Mommy kisses you and tells you how proud she is of you.

Then the next series of visits come with a mixture of walking the aisles all on your own, the incredibly important job of holding the one left-over coin, saying hellos occasionally and many times needing Mommy’s arms for some extra security when things get too close. BUT you walk to and from the market on your own, willingly.

And then one day comes when you leave the gate, bounce off to the market along with your gaggle of sisters, have zero stress in your body as we cross the threshold into the market, follow right along with the pack of foreigners (also know as your family), smile, wave and say hello to the ladies at the market, and return home telling a hundred stories about how happy our guinea pigs will be with their new lettuce and cucumbers.

We are entering into a community in that we might dwell among those here because He chooses to dwell among us.

Oh it takes time and trust building to dwell somewhere. And it takes security snuggling moments. It takes courage and perspective changes. And it takes a lot of practice. But it’s starting to look like home around here. And it’s starting to feel like home too.

One day at a time.

One moment at a time.

Thanks to our Father, Who patiently and gently guides us.

Our Refuge, Our Rock and Our Redeemer.

May they see You as we enter here.

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