{"id":11823,"date":"2005-12-28T16:17:00","date_gmt":"2005-12-28T21:17:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/todayslegacy.wordpress.com\/2005\/12\/28\/ode-to-cheap-earrings"},"modified":"2005-12-28T16:17:00","modified_gmt":"2005-12-28T21:17:00","slug":"ode-to-cheap-earrings","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/todayslegacy.net\/index.php\/2005\/12\/28\/ode-to-cheap-earrings\/","title":{"rendered":"Ode To Cheap Earrings"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.baldwinfurniture.com\/htm\/boxes\/trash_can\/trash_can.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" height=\"237\" alt=\"\" src=\"http:\/\/www.baldwinfurniture.com\/htm\/boxes\/trash_can\/trash_can.jpg\" border=\"0\" \/><\/a><br \/>Nickel, plastic, and all the cheap earring relatives and relati0ns, this one&#8217;s for you:<\/p>\n<p>For every gold sprayed delight and hand painted copper, my sanity goes out to thee.<br \/>Such gifts of green puss and expanding, enkindled ears you give.<br \/>Such superior manufacture, unbreakable to all but the touch.<br \/>And how blissful those Pirate days of one- ear- earringed joy.<\/p>\n<p>Cheap earrings, what would the world do without you?<br \/>Hide and Seek would never be the same.<br \/>Jewlry counters worldwide would vanish all due to content consumers&#8217; discovery of preferable products.<\/p>\n<p>Ah, yes&#8230; cheap earrings&#8230; your dispensible, nominal, glitzy, erroneous, adverse characteristics enervate all your admirers.<\/p>\n<p>So, alas, I must find another&#8230; yes&#8230; I bid thee farewell. I must asset another who can better propitiate and palliate these universal desires of my two lobes.<\/p>\n<p>Farewell. Farewell.<\/p>\n<p>[throws them in the trash can.]<br \/>(I shall be saving for &#8220;real&#8221; earrings.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Nickel, plastic, and all the cheap earring relatives and relati0ns, this one&#8217;s for you: For every gold sprayed delight and [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-11823","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/todayslegacy.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11823","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/todayslegacy.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/todayslegacy.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/todayslegacy.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/todayslegacy.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11823"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/todayslegacy.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11823\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/todayslegacy.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11823"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/todayslegacy.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11823"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/todayslegacy.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11823"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}